Burt Bacharach died yesterday and I have fond…oh-so-fond memories of his music from my childhood.  My dad was a big fan and especially adored the collaboration between “BB” and Dionne Warwick, “I’ll Say a Little Prayer for You”.  I remember my dad humming – loud, happy humming — if the song came on while he was driving or if he was puttering in the garage. 

As a big guy, a former athlete, who stood 6’4” tall, “ISALPFY” seemed an unlikely choice, but dad grooved to it, singing along as a back-up singer/dancer for Dionne.  Boisterous finger tapping on the steering wheel if he was driving and if he was in the garage, any nearby tool – wrench, rake, hammer – became a boisterous, rhythmic instrument.  Air guitar is a thing.  Does that make what he did “air horn”?  No, no – that’s something else 😊.  But you get the idea. Not familiar with the song?  Take a listen here.

This morning I heard a compilation of Burt’s music while I was in the car en route to an appointment and heard something far less appealing…a lesser-known tune sung by Jack Jones called “Wives and Lovers”.  Now…I get it. Burt wrote the song in 1963 and from what I read (when I had a chance to do a little research) BB composed the tune for a movie of the same name, “Wives and Lovers” which was about infidelity. I’d never heard of the film, or the song, prior to this morning and I think my life has been better for it.  Whew!  I know 1963 was long ago…six decades…but the lyrics?  They made me ill. Here’s a snippet, courtesy of Lyrics.com:

Hey! Little girl

Comb your hair, fix your makeup

Soon he will open the door

Don’t think because there’s a ring on your finger

You needn’t try anymore

For wives should always be lovers too

Run to his arms the moment he comes home to you

I’m warning you

Day after day

There are girls at the office

And men will always be men

Don’t send him off with your hair still in curlers

You may not see him again

He’s almost here

Hey! Little girl

Better wear something pretty

Something you’d wear to go to the city and

Dim all the lights, pour the wine, start the music

Time to get ready for love

As I listened, I was appalled.  Mouth open, stunned.  I’m the girl who enjoys some of the throwback, vintage stories culled from magazines, books and newspapers, coaching gals about how to be ‘fetching’ for a man, circa generations gone by. I’ve found them to be humorous…time capsules into the lives of my mother, grandmothers, aunts, sisters everywhere.  But…the “I’m warning you” and you “may not see him again” lyrics gave me waves of nausea.  Creativity and freedom of expression?  All good – but I felt flummoxed.  Why oh why was this sorrowful, misogynistic tune included in a ‘best of’ playlist showcasing compelling works from Burt Bacharach? Ick. Just ick.

I’m not expecting an answer.  The rest of my day today was fab – truly productive and enjoyable – but it started off with a frown and for reasons I can’t quite identify, I felt I needed to share.  With you.  And phew!  I feel better. 

Happy Weekend!

Vicki 😊

23 thoughts on “Vicki Needed to Vent 😊”

  1. Thank you, Victoria, for sharing this post with us for a variety of reasons. I hadn’t heard about the passing of Burt Bacharach. Also, thank you for sharing more about your father and I’d his being a fan. About the lyrics, I hear what you’re saying.

    Wishing you a wonderful weekend!

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  2. I felt that same wave of repulsion when reading the lyrics. Ick is right. When I think back to the olden day, before my time, I imagine it being so wholesome. I suppose there are always the exceptions. Happy weekend, Vicki! Sending you a big hug! 😊

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  4. If it’s any consolation, BB was responsible only for the music, Hal David wrote the lyrics. I always thought it was a catchy tune and to BB’s credit, that’s about the only kind of tunes he wrote – catchy! I’m with your father regarding I’ll Say a Little Prayer. Perfect for “air back up singer!”

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  5. There are days where I think we haven’t progressed much from yesteryear and then I read lines like: “And men will always be men.” Thank goodness it’s 2023 and not 1963. Yea, definitely an icky song, but I think there’s still room to remember Bacharach and the fond memories of your father that he brings back. What a great memory. There’s no question though that it was a different time.

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  6. I just had to have Alexa play I’ll Say a Little Prayer for You to make sure I knew which song it was. So sweet.

    As to the other – you are right, so icky. I’m going to listen to ISALPFY a few more times and try to get the taste out of my mouth. It’s amazing how recently in the big picture women got the right to vote, own land, and all the rest. I suspect there is a stronger undercurrent for not so distant inequities that is present for us all. May we ALL continue to make progress!

    And I’m glad the rest of you day was lovely, my dear friend! 🙂 ❤ ❤

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  7. I’m a big Bacharach fan but never heard that song before. Yikes! Who put that on a greatest hits list?! I’m going to imagine that Burt and Hal David were under a tight deadline and thats the best they could do on limited time. Still doesn’t make it better but I’m grabbing at straws here 😂

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  8. Well…….having lived through that era as a “good little wifey” —yep—I get it—along with a divorce from an unfaithful husband who had a fling with an co-worker whom he later married. Some flings (pun intended) will never change, but thank goodness, attitudes have! We’ve come a long way, baby. Thank God!

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