This photo – snipped in above of a dear deer peeking at me is not my own, but a darn good substitute given that it’s just a stock photo from Google images. Normally I take my own pics, but I had a good reason for restraint. I’ll explain…
I’ve written about the deer that frequent our backyard and included a couple of links to other posts – see below. But my most recent encounter? I’m still marveling about the moment. Full of love, nature and listening. A reminder to slow down.
We have an old girl in the neighborhood – a grand dame of a deer. Our neighbors call her Charlie, and I realize I never asked why. Over the past two years, we’ve watched her age, morphing from a slightly gimpy middle-aged mama to an elder who now struggles to traverse our backyard. Stopping to take a break as she rests under the apple tree.
Autumn is upon us and our apple tree is a hotspot spot for wildlife of all sorts. Charlie sits next to her bunny friends, content to nibble on the fallen apples while she rests. Perhaps tastier delights still hang on the low branches of the tree, but somehow, I think she knows better than to strain herself. Those on the ground will do. Good enough for the bunnies and squirrels, good enough for Charlie.
I watched her for a long time yesterday, hoping that her lifelessness after her feast signaled rest and not…the other. She was entirely still until a delivery truck rumbled down our street, startling her to a standing position. Or the best version of that she could muster.
My heart ached as I saw the effort it took for her to escape to safety. She limped toward the field adjacent to our driveway and garage, making her way into the bramble. And, I hoped, another soft spot to rest. One without noisy human intrusions.
I tiptoed toward the garage and thankfully one of the doors was open, allowing me to silently scan the bramble and bushes, hoping she’d made it that far. Not seeing her, I was about to turn away. Until I caught a glimpse of sweet Charlie staring back at me. Still upright. Motionless but alert as her eyes studied me with a look that conveyed wonder. Just like the face in the photo I’ve included in this post. (I wanted to grab my phone out of my pocket but somehow knew I needed to stay in the moment with my friend.)
“Are you approaching?” Her face seemed to ask.
I didn’t move. She held my gaze, unafraid, so I figured it was time for a chat.
I said hellooooooo with all the melodic “ooooos” I could offer without sounding fearsome. Odd, for sure. But I can’t do anything about that. 😉
She watched and tilted her head.
I said, “Go slow…be safe. I’ll be thinking about you. Come back soon.”
And I’m not gonna lie. I had tears in my eyes the whole time. A lot like the ones that are forming in my eyes even now.
I don’t think Charlie so much as blinked. So, I repeated my little prayer for her, focusing on “go slow, be safe”.
She didn’t move. We were in the midst of an old-fashioned standoff, and I worried that she was using strength she didn’t have in order to remain motionless as she assessed me.
Even though I didn’t want to be the first to break our gaze, I did. Smiling with prayer hands. And for good measure? I did something I’ve never done.
I blew her a kiss.
Charlie lowered her head, as if she was nodding. In receipt of my good wishes? I hoped so as I watched her shift, preparing to move away just as I took a step backward, into the garage.
I hope I’ll see her again, but I have a feeling our hello was also a goodbye. If that’s the case, I’ll carry the gratitude with me. Little moments matter. This one went straight to my heart.
Vicki 💔
Victoria Ponders 
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