I like the whole story. Details. Beginning, middle, end.
The problem? So many things in life are interrupted. Slices and segments. Unfinished business.
I’m thinking about projects, people, issues, incidents, stories. Loops that don’t close.
A wonderful writer friend shared a quote from author Lee Child that I can’t get out of my head; it got my wheels in motion about more than writing. Here’s the quote:
“The way to build suspense is simply to ask a question and then not answer it.”
Interesting. Dangling threads. I can see how intriguing they are from a creative point of view. If compelling enough, tidbits of wonder might stir interest and attention. Captivate, even.
From that perspective, I know some of the best writers demonstrate the talent of hinting. Whispering without oversharing. But from the standpoint of interpersonal communication or self-understanding? Open-endedness drives me loco.
I like definition. Once upon a time a dear friend and fellow graduate student chuckled when we were deep in training about a very popular personality assessment. As we studied career and personality theories, we were pommeled with inventories and of course we used one another as test subjects. 😉 Personality assessments can function as mini mirrors, providing feedback about things like communication styles and I was rarely surprised by the results.
I like words, I like conversation. I like knowing that connections are made along with the assurance of being seen and heard.
It’s been more than two decades but I remember the three words my therapist-in-training-friend used to describe me.
“Vicki in three words? Articulate, articulate, articulate.”
Okay. Got me. Dead to rights. And I embrace it. But when my writer friend shared one of her secrets for weaving a compelling whodunit, referencing Lee Child’s quote, it gave me pause.
Leave some things to the imagination?
Ahhhh. Both in writing, creating and in communication? Which conjured this a-ha: More than once in my life, I’ve received input from family members when I try to explain myself a second, third or fourth time. Replying with exasperation: “Got it. Got it the first time.” Sometimes without words. The sighs suffice.
I know the source of my communication quirks. As a child who was often overlooked or expected to be responsible for far more than I should’ve been, I required recognition. Information. Closure. But I’ve grown. I can say my peace and move on. (Does that sound convincing?)
I wonder. Can I apply the same principle to storytelling? Drop a thought…let it dangle. No need to both ask and answer all questions? I dunno. But my expression in the pic above tells a story. NWR. (No Words Required). Some of the biggest entanglements in my life are of my own making. Self-awareness. The gift that keeps on giving.
Vicki 😊
Hi – I’m Victoria, Vicki, Dr. Vicki. I hold a doctorate in Adult Education and I’m a Licensed Professional Counselor (LPC), and author of Surviving Sue | Eckhartz Press.
Check out this link to learn more about my book about my mom: “Surviving Sue”.
Victoria Ponders 
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