My poke-around method isn’t the same thing as ‘trial and error’.
Let’s be clear.
There’s no method to my madness. No tracking of enthusiastic rounds of ‘trying’ and resulting failures. Not even the micro steps that moved a fix-it campaign forward by an inch or two.
My challenges aren’t limited to technology (just ask the hubster and our dear daughter) but IT IS a chunky category. Including an instance last week where Instagram moved my metaphorical cheese so many times I couldn’t figure out how to do diddle squat in an effort to simply post a pic. (Which brought fatalistic and tempting thoughts about paring down my social media stack.)
My poke-around method is chaotic. I’ll admit it. There’s no log of individual trials…except for the fumes of failures lodged in my intolerant-for-problem-solving-brain. The tendency I have to characterize the entire effort – whatever it is/was – as futile, worthless.
I usher in haste with a side order of randomness. I’m relentless…haphazard. Shall I go on with the synonyms? Got a couple you’d like to add?
In the process, my emotions turn me into a free-range wildebeest. Snorting and aggressive and not very attractive…but maybe that’s just me.
Worse? Because I lack even a modicum of method, I know for sure I move in circles. Invisible, unknown-to-the-user circuitousness where I try the same fixes again and again. To no avail – obvi.
That’s when the frustration and anger morph into crestfallen angst.
I can’t…I’m never gonna…and you know what comes next.
I’m Oscar-worthy when I catastrophize. Don’t try me. The inglorious stage where I demonstrate (further) my incapacity. I inflict barbs and jabs at unsuspecting projects…and occasionally…defenseless people.
And?
I’m an EXPERT at loading up my failure bucket to ensure my hypothesis is true:
I stink at fixing stuff.
At least I can be accurate about that – rounding up my inadequacies!
But I jest. Mostly. We all struggle with our fix-it strategies and I’ve learned the buddy method often saves the day. Acknowledging my limitations, hoping for patience when I ask for help. Admitting my ‘poke-around‘ didn’t work.
I just need to remember to dial down my inner wildebeest before asking for an assist.
-Vicki 😊
Before you go – another chuckle at my expense. One of my favorite confessional posts…Apocalyptic Brownies.
Wildebeest photo courtesy of Dick Scholten on Pexels.com
Hi – I’m Victoria, Vicki, Dr. Vicki. I hold a doctorate in Adult Education and I’m a Licensed Professional Counselor (LPC), and author of Surviving Sue | Eckhartz Press.
Check out this link to learn more about my book “Surviving Sue” – all about resilience and love.
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Victoria Ponders 
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