Resisting the Urge to Write?

I had conversations with three talented authors recently and they all said the same thing in their own unique, evocative way.

Writers need to resist the urge to write.

Yup. You heard me. That’s me paraphrasing, but the message was the same, three times over:

Exercise patience and don’t start writing until you’ve wrapped your arms around the subject matter.

I did a modicum of research for my ‘work-in-progress’ and found some surprising ancestry info. It was research, of a sort, but the topic was still close to home – about myself and my family.

The three writers I heard from talked about their process – conducting painstaking research long before an outline took shape. No story arcs in mind. No characters pre-planted in their heads. They dove into specific places to connect with the subject matter and the power of place, their curiosity guiding them to stories emergent and powerful.

When wisdom arrives in in three successive beats, I figure I should take notice and I did. And then…in my inbox I received a fourth nudge. Just in case I missed the message the first, second or third time…

B.A. Durham, in his blog, Ditch the Oldest Rule in Writing, joined the chorus:

“Every writer has heard it: Write what you know. It’s presented as foundational wisdom, a starting point for any story. However, this advice is limiting and stops you from creating compelling and imaginative work. It’s time we replaced it with a much more powerful mantra: Write what you’re passionate about.”

Whoa and wow.

“Great writing isn’t about having lived something; it’s about being able to portray it convincingly.”

“Passion fuels research, empathy and the creative energy needed…so forget what you know. Go find out what you want to know and write that instead.”

As my current project gets closer to the finish line, I’m musing about what comes next. Whatever it is, I’ll choose well. Remembering the joy writing brings, the restorative power it holds, even if a little digging is involved.

Vicki 💝

Lagniappe? More posts about writing? Here you go!


Hi – I’m Victoria, Vicki, Dr. Vicki. I hold a doctorate in Adult Education and I’m a Licensed Professional Counselor (LPC), and author of Surviving Sue | Eckhartz Press.

Check out this link to learn more about my book “Surviving Sue”.

Click here for Sharing the Heart of the Matter podcasts with talented creatives.

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More posts about writing? Here you go!



99 responses to “Resisting the Urge to Write?”

    1. Thanks, Joy! You are soooo good at the research aspect! 🥰❤️🥰

      Like

  1. Look.at Vic stirring up controversy on a Sunday morning. I do get your point about this though

    Liked by 1 person

    1. LOL – yup. As usual, blog posts as a form of self-talk! Xo, LA! 🥰

      Liked by 1 person

  2. That’s so true. Sometimes I have an idea, start writing, and then find myself lost and thinking, “What is the point of this?” 😂 Research and reflection are key to good writing, I think. Happy Sunday Vicki! 🤗

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Right back to you, dear Michelle! 🥰

      Liked by 1 person

  3. “Write what you’re passionate about.” I love this advice, Vicki!! And yes when you get 3 ‘signs’ it’s probably a good idea to take notice and listen… Sending you much love and success as you near your writing project’s finish line. 💞💞

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Adore you, Rose! Thank you, thank you! 🥰❤️🥰

      Liked by 1 person

  4. Or maybe you should be passionate about the things you know. (Might as well keep the controversy going)

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Ooooh! I like that. Very much. 🥰❤️🥰

      Liked by 1 person

  5. Great post Vicki xo
    Thank you ❤️🥰❤️

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Hugs to you, Maggie! Xo! 🥰❤️🥰

      Liked by 1 person

      1. Many more back to you dear Vicki ❤️🥰xo

        Liked by 1 person

  6. Interesting way to frame it!

    Ancestry stuff is pretty fascinating, isn’t it!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Oh my goodness! Yes!
      Thanks, David! 🥰

      Like

  7. Whoa and wow indeed. I’m still laughing about the “Just in case I missed the message the first, second or third time…” Right!

    I love how you pick up these incredible messages and share them with us. Write about what we’re passionate about – and take the time to do the groundwork. So good!

    Love the way you’ve done both with your new project. So, so good! ❤ ❤ ❤

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you, my dear friend! I love all the “gathering” you and I get to do when we talk with fab creative folks. Always learning! Xo! 🥰❤️🥰

      Liked by 1 person

  8. Write what you are passionate about > Write what you know. No doubt about it, Vicki. It has always been easy to write what I know, it has always been more fun to write what I am passionate about. This post was a very timely, friendly reminder for me. Thank you!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Well, now. My work here is done…a “timely, friendly reminder”. Thank you, Bruce. Appreciate you and the encouragement I receive from reading your posts!
      💝😊💝

      Liked by 1 person

  9. Rich and helpful information. Thank you very much, Dr. Vicki. ✨👏🏻

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you, Michele! Hope all is going well…sending big hugs! 😊💝😊

      Like

      1. You’re most welcome! All is well, thank you. Wishing same for you and thank you! 🤗 I’m en route to Portland with a forever friend. 👯 Happy Sunday! 💝

        Liked by 1 person

        1. Enjoy!!! 🥰❤️🥰

          Liked by 1 person

  10. great information and also a great mind shift with thoughtful purpose. this has helped me already to rethink what I will do moving ahead with my writing. I appreciate you sharing this collective wisdom.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Aww…you are so sweet and talented. I’m not sure you need any input from me, dear Beth. Sounds like your creative wheels are in motion…can’t wait to hear/see/read! xo! 💝😊💝

      Liked by 1 person

      1. everyone needs advice, we just don’t always know it –

        Liked by 1 person

        1. Love ya, Beth! 🥰❤️🥰

          Like

  11. Love the advice, Vicki, and really puts the creative in creative writing. Research and passion have so much to play in creating compelling and memorable stories and characters!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Oh my goodness, yes. I’m learning so, so much! Thanks, Ab! 😊💝😊

      Liked by 1 person

  12. I am glad your writing restores you, Vicki. That, by itself is a reason to write. I would add, however, that some writing projects intended for publication have caused “crash and burn” experiences.

    I know an author of two published academic books who was professor at a major university and who expected much more recognition from their publication than he received. Two others, who attempted to write the history of a great orchestra found the task so overwhelming that they had to give it up. I think a realistic expectation of what is possible and what is not might be worth a hopeful book author’s consideration.

    Put another way, if there is something desired by a potential author that is almost as as attractive as the successful book writing project, he might want to consider the alternative to years spent in the hope of publication and some form of stardom. The Nobel Prize winning psychologist Daniel Kahneman offered much the same advice when he gave the example of Olympic gold medals as a goal that leaves almost all in disappointment. Modest goals might not be as sexy, but they often lead to more happiness.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Love your insight and perspective. Understanding the motivation to write – no matter the outcome – seems like sound advice. “I think a realistic expectation of what is possible and what is not…worth consideration.” Powerful, Dr. Stein. Thank you! 💝

      Like

  13. Write what you’re passionate about is sound advice, indeed.

    Like

    1. Sunday hugs and smiles to you! Thanks, Katherin!
      💝🥰💝

      Liked by 1 person

  14. Ok, I’ll admit it. I had to giggle when I saw “Ditch the Oldest Rule in Writing” in your post. It definitely captured my attention too when it arrived in my inbox a few days ago, haha. (I recently joined CWA for a year to test it out.) I also thought the word passionate was such great insight. And research is always valuable, it backs up and clarifies your topic, but for me, I don’t want too many facts to bury the power of the story. It is always about the story.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Oooh! Love your point about being judicious about facts – so true! Love that you saw this same piece in your inbox and that you joined CWA! We’ll need to compare notes! 🥰❤️🥰

      Liked by 1 person

  15. I totally agree here: Write what you’re passionate about.

    Or, write what you can wrap your heart around. Or, write the stories you love to read. They all add up the same way.

    It’s also what makes research so much fun too, discovering new things to become passionate about.

    Thanks so much for sharing this, Vicki!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I love that your heart comes through in your writing, my friend. Glimpses of all the things that matter to you, delivered within compelling stories…”When Things Go Missing” is such a rich example! xo! 💝🥰💝

      Liked by 1 person

      1. Aww, thank you so much, Vicki!

        Liked by 1 person

  16. Your advice is wise, Victoria.

    Like

    1. Many thanks, Tim! I hope you’re having a terrific day today. Thank you for stopping by. 🥰

      Liked by 1 person

  17. Patience, passion, portrayal –
    they will do the job just fine.
    Happy crossover point Vicki xx

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you, Margaret! Sending hugs! 🥰

      Liked by 1 person

  18. Write what you’re passionate about.

    Oh, Vicki, I love this so much! If authors were limited to writing about what they know, novels like “No Time for Kings” would never exist. I promise I have never fired a shoulder-mounted rocket in my life (but I hope I portrayed this convincingly).

    Thank you for sharing!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Smiling! So big! Whew! Color me relieved, LOL! 🥰🤣🥰

      Liked by 1 person

  19. “Remembering the joy writing brings, the restorative power it holds, even if a little digging is involved.” Wonderful stuff. Three successive beats . . . yea, fate is trying to tell you something. I’m pretty sure the message is that we can’t wait to read your next piece of work!!!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Awww! I’m in the thick of it, for sure! Thanks, Brian! 🥰❤️😉

      Liked by 1 person

      1. Hang in there! If you need anything, you have a blog full of friends ready to jump in and help!!! You’ve got this! Can’t wait to read the next project!!!

        Liked by 1 person

        1. You….are….the….best! Can’t wait to share it with you! 🥰❤️🥰

          Liked by 1 person

  20. I agree with these writers’ advice for the most part. Still, it seems everyone has a different take, from “write what you know” to “don’t limit yourself” to “plot out everything in advance” to “become more of a pantser” and hundreds of other contradictory points. I’ve settled on “figuring out what works for yourself” because there are so many different paths, none of which are wrong.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Cheers to all of that, Pete! I think that’s the best insight of all — do what works for oneself. Thank you! 🥰😉🥰

      Liked by 1 person

  21. It’s good to go for what we are passionate about. Thank you for this inspiring post.

    Liked by 1 person

  22. Great advice. Great information. Write what you love and know.
    Thanks Vicki Lou!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Awww….sending loads of love to you, Nancy Lou! 🥰❤️🥰

      Liked by 1 person

      1. I feel it Vicki Lou!🥰🥰

        Liked by 1 person

  23. True!!….i started writing and felt like i was losing motivation after a few days when i was not seeing the results. The key is persistence and keep believing in yourself.

    Liked by 1 person

  24. This post provides many empowering nuggets for all writers, Vicki. I love this:

    “Exercise patience and don’t start writing until you’ve wrapped your arms around the subject matter.”

    Wishing you the best as you near the finish line, and I know your new project will be a masterpiece! 🥰❤️🌷

    Liked by 1 person

    1. You are so dear, Lauren! Thank you…appreciate your encouraging words! 🥰💝🥰

      Liked by 1 person

      1. You’re always welcome, Vicki! Hugs 🥰🌻

        Liked by 1 person

  25. Excellent advice, and it reminded me of advice I received over a decade ago about not talking about things we don’t know. Exercising patience is key.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Great point! Yes! Thank you so much, Edward. 🥰

      Liked by 1 person

      1. You’re very welcome, my friend. I forgot to mention that piece about “Go find out what you want to know and write that instead” also works great for the things we don’t know but want to learn, so we can then talk about them. 🫶🏼

        Liked by 1 person

        1. You…you…you, Edward! You are so talented in that regard! Reading and exploring complex topics and then summarizing, articulating meaningful points. Appreciate your research skills and diligence. Xo! 🥰

          Liked by 1 person

          1. Thank you, my friend. 🙏🏼

            Liked by 1 person

  26. Sometimes it seems that all of the advice is true, even when it’s contradictory 🤪 I guess that’s how it is with artistic things. 😅 Seriously though- I can relate to resisting the urge to write until the time is right. Whenever I start too early (aka I lack info, passion or clarity of purpose), it doesn’t go well.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Oooh! Starting too early! That’s such a terrific way of thinking about timing. Not a surprise coming from you, talented Todd. So good! 🥰😎🥰

      Liked by 1 person

      1. Thanks for the morning ego-boost! 🙂💚

        Liked by 1 person

        1. You betcha! 🥰😎🥰

          Liked by 1 person

  27. There is truth to this, Vicki. Some believe they can simply keep writing. A few even think their writing off-the-cuff is good-to-go. Personally, I rarely get the full picture from those writers. Much is still left in their heads.

    Every word, every comma counts and empowers a story or poem.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Oh my goodness, Mary! I love your perspective. Thank you so much. 🥰

      Liked by 1 person

  28. I love the way you pay attention, Vicki. You have your own voice and a wealth of knowledge, but you are open to embracing the ideas of others. Enjoy the process! I love your work!

    Like

    1. Love you, Lori. So glad we’ve connected…sending super-duper Thursday hugs to you! 💝🥰💝

      Liked by 1 person

      1. I am loving and hugging you right back, Vicki! 😁♥️😁

        Liked by 1 person

        1. So good! Received!!! 🥰❤️🥰

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  29. This makes sense, although I hadn’t thought of it before. Thanks.

    Liked by 1 person

  30. From ‘patience’ to ‘whoa and wow’, this was spot on!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Aww!! Xo, Jennie! 🥰❤️🥰

      Liked by 1 person

  31. I once read a column by a successfully published author who encouraged other writers to develop, not their memories, but their “forgetories.”

    It’s the ideas which won’t go away, she wrote, that we want to work with.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Ah! Thank you, Ana! I love that. 🥰

      Liked by 1 person

  32. Interesting suggestions Vicki! 🤔 Thanks for sharing.

    I write about what I know and what I don’t know that I want to find out about. ✍🏼 I suppose when questions about what I know, as much as what I don’t know surfaces just when I least expect it, I have my trusty pen(s) and pad standing by, because the questions lead me to greater awareness about my curiosity.

    I suppose in every writer’s universe, they have their secret sauce for creativity and what works in their orbit. Hugs and smooches my dear friend. Have a wonderful weekend. 😊💖🌞

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Love, love, love your perspective, sweet Kym. Hugs and kisses back atcha!
      🥰❤️🥰

      Liked by 1 person

      1. Awwww Dr. V!!! 😍💖😘

        Like

  33. EXCELLENT advice – when I start writing because I believe I need to put a post out, it typically falls flat. BUT when I write because I am passionate and inspired, the words flow quickly, and the entire blog can be written within 15 minutes (minus edits, rewrites, spelling, grammar, etc.). Your blog is so true—wait for the “write” moment to write! Thank you! XOV

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Love you, Vickie! So good! “Wait for the right moment to write”. Xo! 🥰❤️🥰

      Liked by 1 person

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