Finding the Funny Bones


No, no. This isn’t a Halloween late-arrival.  Nope, not a post I forgot to…post.  Can’t a girl share a skeleton image, here and there, without provoking All Hallows Eve imagery?  😉 I haven’t made my point yet, but trust me, these skeletons are good time girls…maybe boys?  I can’t tell from here.  Just the same, there’s no downer drivel here, just good stuff, courtesy of George Bernard Shaw.  Well, yes, he – the famous author and me, just me.


Shaw wrote, in his 1930 novel “Immaturity”:

Some of you know I enjoy unpacking family history, sometimes bringing discomfort to light because that’s where I’ve made meaning from bucketloads of drama.  I don’t mind the muck and the mire, I’m an emotional adventurer and I’m down for the duty. The dirty duty. Spelunking with the ancestors, uncovering bits and pieces that, singularly, mean little but smooshed together?  Oh – portrayals of truth, triumph, and peeks into the lives I cannot touch, at least not directly, with many loved ones long gone.

For every bit of unseemliness that I discover, there are joyful aspects.  My family had plenty of skeletons but darn it all, they also knew how to make the most of the madness and dance.  We were the ‘fun house’ no matter where we lived, party central, because my parents knew that laughter was magic.  It didn’t make the turmoil disappear but from their examples, I learned that ‘dancing it out’ was a remedy in and of itself because it lessened the magnitude of the heavy stuff, even if only for a while.

As my parents grew older, the best part of family get togethers were the memory lane moments – the unplanned yet consistent after dinner traditions of ‘telling tales’ about one another’s mishaps and goofy adventures.  There were so many…and because everyone was ‘dancing’, there were no arguments, no insults – just laughter at, with and around one another. 

From me to you…okay, and a little bit from David Bowie… Let’s Dance!

Vicki 💕

Join us for more fun…inspiration and stories from the heart…at The Heart of the Matter! 🤍



27 responses to “Finding the Funny Bones”

  1. See, Victoria–receiving notification of your posts again–thank goodness!

    Thank you for sharing another post about your family history. Your feelings for them (and about them) are so palpable. I also love your use of language–for example, “spelunking.” A great big enthusiastic YES for the entire post. But, of course, that shouldn’t surprise you.

    🙂

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Ahh…thank you, Art! I think we’re like minded…looking for the good. Spelunking or otherwise! LOL! 😎

      Like

    2. Yes, I was just coming to say that I love the imagery of spelunking with the ancestors! And it’s such a great exercise to transform old dramas into something novel, and sometimes even fun!

      Liked by 2 people

  2. I was thinking of David Bowie as I read this. I have my moments when I’m interested in family genealogy and then my interests wanes. Maybe I need to think of it as a dance, rather than an obligation.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I love that Bowie was also ‘with you’ as you read, Ally…and yes, maybe you’re on to something. Less somber/sobering and more dance beats and fun? Worth a try and you can have David Bowie with you as a musical backdrop. xo! 😉

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  3. I needed this advice today Vicki. I like exploring those discomforts too, because I think that’s where the real growth happens, but I hesitate sometimes because how the discomforts may affect the living. But like you wrote, it doesn’t have to be negative. It can be a funny laugh or crazy dance. I have to remember that. Thanks so much. Thanks for the Bowie reference too. Perfect for a Wednesday!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Woohoo! Cheers to music that helps us move through a Wednesday! Thank you for reading and for your comment, Brian…love our like-mindedness, friend! 😉😉😉

      Liked by 1 person

  4. Looking back at the generations of my family while trying to make sense of it all for my kids has been challenging and interesting to say the least. I think mine didn’t know the meaning of the words “let’s dance” but firmly locked their skeletons in very deep, dark closets. I long to be able to dig through all that stuff they felt obliged to hide while reminding myself that societal shame and judgment was probably a huge factor. Your parents gave you a gift Vicki. Keep dancing!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you for that reminder, Deb. You’re right, they did – give me a gift! Despite the scandals and drama, they moved through a lot of pain and although some of their secrets have been difficult to digest — only coming to light long after they’ve passed – it helps immensely to have silly memories to recall alongside the more challenging ones. Thank you for that perspective. I appreciate it. xo! ❤

      Liked by 1 person

  5. Laughter is magic – I love that. And making our bones dance is such good therapy – for the dead and the undead. Thank you for this wonderful, well-written, lighthearted but also deep reminder!! 🙂 ❤ ❤

    Liked by 1 person

  6. Oh yes, dancing is much more therapeutic than so many realize. Especially the impromptu “get up and step it out moments” when otherwise we’d just be sitting around staring at each other.
    💃🕺

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I’m with you! Oddly, even for we somewhat inhibited folks, dancing beats a stare down any day! Thanks for that, Michael! 😉😉😉

      Liked by 1 person

  7. You spelunked right down into heart of the matter—finding the funny bones amidst the buried unseemliness. What a treasure hunt. I envy your youth, living in a dance-filled fun house! I also love, love, love your way with words!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Well, now. That is just about the kindest compliment you could ever, ever offer, Julia! I’m starting to come to terms with the fact that I need to just let words flow w/o a lot of editing because I lose myself when I pause and putz too much. Still, I often wonder if my ‘inner Vicki’ should pipe down, just a tad. 😉 Thanks for your encouraging words and for the recognition that I was a lucky duck in so many ways, growing up crazy – yes. But with lots of love and plenty of frivolity and dancing! xo and big hugs, my friend! 💕💕💕

      Liked by 1 person

      1. Please don’t ever let yourself be tempted to stifle your Inner Vicki. She is a delight. Your words are musical and magical. Let ’em rip, I say!

        Liked by 1 person

        1. My favorite kind of girlfriend is the full-on, loving encourager/enabler sort…and I believe that’s you! I’m so happy to have met you here in the blogging world, Julia. Cheers and love! 💕💕💕

          Liked by 1 person

          1. Awww. Sweet! Same to you blogging friend!

            Liked by 1 person

  8. Audience of One Avatar
    Audience of One

    I too love the imagery, Vicki, and the talk of making our bones dance. Such a great – and fun – post!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Kendra…thank you! xoxoxo! 🤍🤍🤍

      Liked by 1 person

  9. Families takes of goofiness and misadventure are favorites with my family too😎

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thanks, Todd! 😎😎😎

      Like

  10. You are so wise! And I love this quote. Family secrets – those skeletons lurking in the closet, are so much less hurtful or painful once they’re let out to dance. And you do a great job writing stories of your family. You inspire me!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Pam! Thank you so very much…I am humbled by your lovely comment. I don’t know about the wisdom part…maybe some insights come as we marinate with memories over time? I’m grateful to you for reading…and the bonus of such warm and positive feedback? I’m filled to the brim, brim, brim! Hugs to you! 🥰🥰🥰

      Liked by 1 person

      1. “Marinate with Memories” Ohhhhh how I love this. I might “borrow” it. :-). Yes, you are WISE. xo

        Liked by 1 person

        1. You’re making me smile! Yes, please…borrow away. Thank you, Pam! 💕

          Like

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