We have the best neighbors. Our house sits on a quiet street and I’m grateful for the scenery and serenity. I’m a lucky girl. I DO enjoy a little ‘hub bub’ now and then and city life can be exciting, but I appreciate the wildlife (okay, not the coyotes, TBH) and the panoramic views of open fields and nature in our little corner of the world.
We’re close enough to urban conveniences that we’re not deprived of life’s essentials (pizza from Costco…I can’t quit you no matter how hard I try) or doses of culture thanks to the metro area just 30 minutes away, replete with museums, botanic gardens. Ahh…botanic gardens…growing things! As I stare out the window in front of my desk, I see bare trees – still lovely in a linear and spare way – surrounded by snatches of olive-green grass. Not the new grass of spring but a blend of last year’s turf mixed with mud and muck thanks to melting snow. A stunning neutral palette.
When we moved here, we hoped our neighbors would be nice – friendly but not too much so. I mean…we came here for the quiet…not coffee klatches at the curb. I did that duty when our daughter was young and hated it. I was the only mom on our block who was working outside the home and every evening as I tried to be stealthy and swift to get the mail, I’d invariably get stuck talking with one or two stay-at-homers about who got the best manicure that week. 😉
Okay, I’m exaggerating. It didn’t happen every day and I’m not trying to disparage anyone – least of all stay-at-home moms. Still, it happened often enough that I developed a reputation for being standoffish and aloof. I don’t think so. I was just dog tired and disinterested in gossip – both from other moms and the biggest busybody of the neighborhood, a self-involved jerk named Jim who knew everyone’s business like the Gladys Kravitz of the block. Not sure who Gladys is? OMG. I won’t judge you but check it out…I’ll help with a link. And I’ll wait for you.
Back to our current home…and less snarky Vicki. 😉 We hit the jackpot here – and not just because we loved the house. I wrote about that a while ago. The house waited for us and it’s a fantastic story. The house was perfect and the neighbors? Ready in a pinch if we need a helping hand but willing to look the other way because they have manners and value their own privacy. Which reminds me of the time I literally flew outside to pick up trash in a windstorm…while still in my robe and pajamas.
Yes, that happened last March, while the hubs was in the hospital recuperating. Gale force, explosive winds were forecast on trash day and I half-listened while I shuffled around, making the first cup of coffee of the morning. Ignoring weatherman Rich and choosing instead to pat myself on the back for task completion, I put the bins out early and ignored the ‘we’re going to carried to Oz today’ forecast. Stupid, stupid, stupid me. Note to self? Picking up errant cans, bottles and loose paper while trying to keep my robe closed IS an Olympic-worthy event.
Later that day one of our sweet neighbors ambled over to bring a kettle of homemade soup and bread for dinner. They knew I wasn’t eating well – or much – while the hubster was ill (well, there was always Costco pizza…) and they were so good to me. Making small talk, checking in about the hubster and the pupster, Sadie. For a second, I thought about my wild morning but figured my escapades with flying trash occurred too early in the a.m. to draw attention.
You know what’s coming. I was wrong. Ever gracious and well-mannered, as our neighbor dropped off dinner, she lightly mentioned the free-for-all show from the morning, simply saying, “Oh, and I’m so glad you were able to round up the trash this morning. You were really getting a workout, weren’t you?” She saw. All of it. Her hubs, too.
Since then – and because of other examples of doing what my dad used to call showing my a**, I’ve become more comfortable with periodic bouts of public embarrassment. Often the best diversion tactic is remembering no one cares…and if laughter is a by-product of a “Vicki show”, hey – good stuff! I’m pretty skilled at laughing along. Sometimes I’m the first to get the guffaws going.
Leaping ahead to this past month, our dear neighbor and her husband are experiencing a pile-up of their own health challenges. Thank goodness the universe is toggling between he…and she…so they’re able to help one another with procedures, hospitalizations and endless appointments. It’s so hard to know how to help and offers to be their chauffeur/personal Uber driver or run errands were waved off…but when I offered to cook for them – simple foods – stew, pasta, casseroles, sweet treats? A resounding ‘yes’.
For a few weeks we’ve been rotating empty dishes back to our house so I can fill them up with new meals. I don’t know how to cook for two – just the hubs and myself – so this has been an easy and fulfilling task for me because I always make too much. Most of all, I’m heartened to know my simple comfort food is lessening a burden for this dear couple.
The other evening when I dropped off a meal, our neighbor thanked me again…and again…and again…and this time, as I walked away, she said:
“I know you had a rocky relationship with your mother, but good Lord, she would be proud of you. She raised a wonderful human.”
It was dusk and given that I was 20 feet or so away, I doubt she saw my eyes well up, but they did. To the brim. Yes. For all the misgivings and challenges, my mother had a heart for serving others. Ever aware of how fragile her hold on reality was…she was grateful every day when others received her with love. If you did – receive her with love and kindness – she was your friend for life. And oh, my yes. She WOULD feed you. Apple? Tree? That’s me. And my mom. 💓
Hugs and love,
Vicki 😊
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