“To lose balance sometimes, for love, is part of living a balanced life.” 

-Elizabeth Gilbert

I fell out of balance last week – this from the girl who likes order and routine, as much as possible.  Our senior sweetie, Sadie, struggled and the dilemma?  You know the one.  Is it time?  For several days, we adjusted and responded to her decline in mobility, eating habits – and as much as we wanted to wish the reality away, it persisted.

I’m terrible at good-byes.  As a kid who moved 10 times in 12 years, I became accustomed to the rituals, the assurances, “we’ll stay in touch” … “we’ll visit often” …words intended to calm and soothe a heartbroken little girl. Now I know the truth.  Some beings – furry loved ones and humans – aren’t intended to be with us forever.  We enjoy, love, and relish our seasons with them and when loss comes, focusing on sweet memories and loving moments helps to reset equilibrium.

On Friday night we had a family dinner with our daughter. The hubster, wonderful man that he is, decided Sadie might ‘join us’ and he put a pic of her on the TV near our kitchen table.  Just like us, our daughter was bereft and sad and while the image of sweet Sadie on the hubster’s ‘jumbotron’ was startling at first, we acknowledged and welcomed her as we sat and shared a meal together. 

We won’t do it again, but it was a fitting goodbye – a final family meal with our “other” daughter, sweet Sadie…the fourteen-year-old cuddle muffin who made our lives fun, wild and fantastic.  And that?  That’s what we’ll remember and hold dear.

Vicki 💖

43 thoughts on “Losing Balance”

  1. Thank you, Victoria, for sharing so openly from your heart. I’ve also never liked goodbyes; there’s s an implied “ache” buried within the word.

    This has eased with awakening to a deeper dimension of Self. I’ll offer the following quote (originally found in “The Master Key System,” by Charles F. Haanel) which I included in my book: “The spirit of the thing ‘is’ the thing.”

    Sending compassionate kind wishes,

    Art

    Liked by 4 people

    Reply

    2. I echo Art’s compassionate kind wishes, and wish I knew how to alleviate the pain you’re suffering. I can only imagine how difficult the 10 departures in 12 years had to be, but one after having the opportunity to bond for 14 yeas has to be much more so?

      Art’s quote reminded me of A.A. Milne’s Pooh saying “How lucky I am to have something that makes saying goodbye so hard.”

      Big BIG BIG hug!

      Liked by 2 people

      Reply

  2. I’m so sorry to hear about your loss, Vicki. 💔 Pets are family and the goodbyes are so hard. From what you’re written, it sounds like Sadie was a tenderly loved and thoroughly pampered pup. You gave your second daughter a wonderful life, and I’m certain her memory will linger long past her body. Sending a big hug your way, my friend. 💕💕

    Liked by 2 people

    Reply

  3. Oh Vicki, no!! 😢😢 I’m so, so sorry to hear of Sweet Sadie’s passing. The grief over losing these little loved ones can run deep, and I pray any tears have brought (or bring) healing and solace. Sending you much love and many hugs, my friend! ❤️

    Liked by 2 people

    Reply

    1. Thank you so much, Kendra….I know you’ve been down this road recently with Whistle Britches…it’s not fun…but it’s a part of living and loving, right? Thanks for the hugs and love! Sending them back your way. 💖💖💖

      Liked by 1 person

      Reply

  4. Oh Vicki, I’m so sorry! I’m so sorry for your loss. Aww. You wrote so eloquently about Sadie in the past and today. Fell out of balance? When Nittany starts to falter, and we’re starting to see signs, I’m going to be a wreck. Sadie was a part of your family. I can’t thank you enough too for the great example on how to say goodbye. It’s an “until we see each other again.” Thinking of you guys. Sending positive thoughts and prayers to your family and you.

    Liked by 2 people

    Reply

    1. You are so sweet….and yes…I’ve often thought about Sadie and Nittany — about the same age and they are/were such PRESENT beings in our lives. Your stories about Nittany and having people in the house…she sounds like such a character, and so much fun, so much personality. 😉 Thanks so much, Brian. Appreciate you. 😘

      Liked by 1 person

      Reply

  6. Okay please put trigger warning on your post. Im crying AGAIN!!! I admit I’m a HUGE cry baby but your last two posts touched my heart so much!
    I’m so sorry for your loss, our fur babies are so sweet and kind to us.

    Liked by 2 people

    Reply

  7. Vicki, it is beyond words when we lose someone who has made our life so joyful. I am truly sorry for the loss of your Sadie. I know you will hold dear memories of her in your heart. Hugs.

    Liked by 3 people

    Reply

      1. If “that” means getting to the point that you laugh, time will take care of it.

        If you mean how I know this, I have lived long enough to learn some things and suffered my sadnesses, including for our dog.

        Thank you, Vicki.

        Liked by 2 people

        Reply

        1. Oh, I think there’s one big vat of “Dr. Stein THAT” — all of your good humor, wisdom and generosity — being so very present and considerate. I’m not sure how you do THAT that. 😉 You’re a marvel and I’m grateful. And you knew this was coming…big hugs! 🥰🥰🥰

          Like

          Reply

  10. Oh, oh, oh – I’m so sorry about dear Sadie! It is so hard to say “good-bye” to our dear four-legged friends, they are such loyal and loving companions. Wishing you all a great big hug from me as you adjust to this loss. ❤ ❤ ❤

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply

  11. I never knew the joy of having a fur baby in my life until my “inner self” insisted that I get one. I never knew how much I loved dogs until I got my little Charlie. I am so grateful for the experience, and so aware of the positive impact that he had, both on me, and my life. I understand so well the depth of your loss, and I pray that the hole in the hearts will be filled with the love of those love you the most. Blessings, dear one. 💕

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply

  12. Vicki, so sorry for your loss. This made me recall when my childhood cat passed while I was away at school. For a while, I beat myself up that I wasn’t there at the end. Eventually, that feeling was replaced with gratefulness I had the chance to share my life with him. Pets is not really an appropriate word to describe just how much they become part of you, of your family, of your life. I’m of the mind your very fitting “goodbye” was actually “until we meet again.”

    Liked by 2 people

    Reply

  13. Hurts me to my core. Making that decision must’ve been tough, over everything else about your loss that you had to deal with. Wishing you all the best with the grief, but I’m also happy for the goodness Sadie has brought to your life.

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply

  14. I’m so sorry, Vicki… what a sweetie your little Sadie was… like Bruce, I always feel like calling them our ‘pets’ just doesn’t quite work. They are family, plain and simple. How lucky Sadie was, to have a family that loved her so much… I really and truly am sorry for your loss…xo 💕💕💕

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply

    1. You are so sweet, Patti. Thank you for reading and for sharing that warm and wonderful reminder. You’re right. She loved…we loved…that’s the most important thing! Thank you so much. Sending big hugs to you! 💕💕💕

      Liked by 1 person

      Reply

    1. Thank you so much. Every day’s been a little better and while it’s a little nutty, we’re still talking to her…brought her wee little urn home yesterday and it’s given us a little peace and closure. Hugs to you, my friend! 💖

      Liked by 1 person

      Reply

        1. Thank you for sharing that — I love the lamp idea! And I hadn’t thought about a photo. The hubs and I arranged her two favorite toys and blanket next to her urn, but I think we can do better. The most important thing is remembering, right? xo! 💖

          Liked by 1 person

          Reply

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

Gravatar
WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. ( Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. ( Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. ( Log Out /  Change )

Cancel

Connecting to %s

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.